My Secret Place

Posted on November 19, 2013 by dominique

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I want to share with you
a place inside me
even lovers don?t know about.

Where pain and pleasure meet,

merge in their intensity

Bringing me to shudder and convulse,

shiver and weep.

Where everything I avoid

and everything I am seeking

are the same thing.

The depth of me,

essence of my human heart.

The truth revealed:

I am just a bundle of longing and love.

In secret moments,

I know this.

Know

? ? ?the intimate infinite inside my own body

Know

? ? ?that I am nothing but a fool chasing heightened sensation

Know

? ? ?the way the sun kisses my back in the Summer

Know

? ? ?the way rain tastes on my tongue in November.

The closest way to express it

is in silence

or in poetry

or to find that same place in you and delight in it, together.

It is my inner marriage,

where duality is forgotten in the night,

where eternity makes love with time

and gives birth to change.

It is the subtle thread of dissatisfaction present in every experience,

every moment slightly uncomfortable,

the almost there,

never enough,

ever erotic.

Some call it divine

because words cannot touch it?

for in the very act, words distinguish,

and this place in me knows no separation.

It is the wellspring from which my life pours,

Where I die in devotion

and steep in union.

Place of awakening,

what the mystics call the Beloved,

and yet it is the simplest truth my brain could ever comprehend.

it is no more abstract than a pebble on the ground,

no more beautiful than a flower growing between the cracks of a sidewalk.

It is a merging,

in-the-body explosion of all sensation at once.

So intense,

I disappear,

burn in its fire

and remember who I am:

boundariless,

temporary, yet

infinite.

From this place, I can?t deny the value

of a single breath

or a sip of water

a moment on this Earth.

Precious time.

Death meets life.

It is the union sexuality longs for,

House of mirrors

where Shiva and Shakti are one.

Some nights I can follow my loneliness in,

dig deeper, lean into my longing,

and tap this wellspring of infinity

inside me,

place of inner marriage

where my devotion to truth lives.

It is so potent,

I?ve committed my life

to living out its wisdom

to listening to the voice of this secret place

to embodying the essence of me,

to following it home.

Just a glimpse of this soul-light

is enough to sustain me,

enough for me to remember in forgotten moments

that I am just a bundle of longing and love

washing dishes with God.

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? -Dominique Youkhehpaz

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My Secret Place

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