Give Your Gift

A seed is planted in a bed of soil.

If that seed were to wait until the conditions of its environment were perfect in order to sprout, we would have no food and no plants on this earth.

If the birds were to hold back their morning song, waiting for the perfect morning to sing, they would be mute.

If the sun were to wait for the perfect day to rise, we would spend our entire lives in darkness. ?That is, if we would still be alive.

If Gandhi or Martin Luther King Jr. or The Beatles waited until they were perfect to give their gifts of song and service to the world, where would we be today?

Squirrels are not perfect. ?The clouds are not perfect. ?Trees are not perfect. ?Nature is not perfect. It is so uniquely and unabashedly itself that concepts of perfection and imperfection do not apply.

Perfect compared to what? ?Imperfect compared to what? ?These are manmade images. ?They do not exist–save in our minds.

There is a gift unique to this moment that wants to be given by you.

 

Perhaps it is a song, or a poem, or a novel, or a workshop. ?Perhaps it is the gift of life breathing you fully. ?Your innocent, authentic offering of what you have learned in this lifetime. ?Raising children with love. Or raising yourself with love.

It is the gift of being you completely. ?It cannot be given by anybody else. ?And it cannot be given in the future; it can only be given right now.

For some reason, we hold back from giving our deepest gifts, denying the sacred, creative impulses of our heart because we believe we’re not ready, worthy, or perfect enough yet. ?Instead, we confine ourselves to boxes of mediocrity, waiting for some future idea of perfection that does not exist.

We carry around a laundry list of things we need to change about ourselves before we will be ready to step into our power.

As if that day will ever come. ?Maybe for some it does. ?But personally, I’m not willing to wait that long.

We hold onto this idea that someday, a clear sign from outside ourselves will come to us and tell us we are ready to do what we’ve always longed to do. ?A miracle will happen. ?A shooting star. ?A magical bird, or fairy, or angel will appear and speak to us in our dreams. ?Perhaps. ?But when the sun rises, and the birds chant their morning song, and overwhelming beauty of life greets me with another day to live, I take that as my miracle, as my sign that it is time.

Our goals of perfection keep us safe. ?They tell us it’s okay not to live our full potential because we’re not ready.

When it comes to stepping into the unknown of my full potential, I have learned that I may never feel “ready.” ?I may feel afraid, nervous, excited, unsure, vulnerable. ?I often don’t feel “ready” until I have already stepped into it, until I am already doing what I so long to do, and sometimes not even then. ?But my commitment to give my gift fully is deeper than any feeling of being ready. ?With the attitude of a child, I claim my unique purpose in the world: “Ready or not? Here I come!”

I can feel that the stories that often hold me back are not mine, they are collective. For example, I have this idea that I cannot give my gift to the world until I am over 40 or have already been giving my gift for 20 years–which is a catch-22, because we all have to start somewhere. ?And I choose to start right here, right now.

In our lives, we strive to be better than we are. ?Naturally, we yearn to grow. ?We long for perfection, and this longing is holy–we wish not to be confined to our limited selves. ?But this longing doesn’t have to hold us back from giving our gifts to the world.

?And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.?

?Ana?s Nin

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The suffering we experience when we hold back our gifts and die without having lived fully is greater than the growing pains of allowing ourselves to step into our intrinsic greatness.

Right here, right now, I choose to give my gift. ?I will not let another day slip by without offering the abundant gifts of my heart for the world to feast on. ?Not selfishly, but innocently, with the enthusiasm of a newborn child.

In service to a better world, I will live my life fully. ?May it inspire you to do the same.

 

?This piece is inspired by our recent Self-Marriage Weekend Retreat for Women in NYC. ?Next week, we will have a Self-Marriage Daylong Ceremony for Women in Berkeley, CA, USA. ?For more information, view this page.